A year in the life....
Here I am! I am have doing this single mom gig for one year today. February 7, 2006 is the day that my ex-husband and I decided to seperate. In the immediate aftermath of the seperation I truly thought we would reconcile. We talked about it a lot and it seemed like we each just needed a break and that after some time we could get back together.
Obviously, that is not how things happened. If someone had told me that a year ago, I would have been devastated. Now....I'm okay. I wish I could say I'm great. I wish I could say I'm the happiest I've ever been. I can't say those things though. I can say that I survived. I stumbled several times a long the way. I have experienced depression so heavily that I did not want to make it to the next day. I have experienced a lot of sadness in this past year. More than my share, I'm afraid. But I made it. I'm here, really no worse for the wear.
In a sense, I feel somewhat empowered by that. I wish I felt more empowered by it. I wish I had made some great stride in the past year that would make me feel proud for doing it by myself. However, much of my year truly was just surviving. Just making it to the next day. Doing what I absolutely had to do and no more. I know that is an accomplishment, I didn't think I could do that much...by myself.
I wonder what the future holds for me and my boys. I know now, that is a good thing that we can't foresee our futures. We go through things in our life that we need to experience. We have no idea how it will change us inside. I try not to be afraid of my future. If anything, I know I'll be able to get through whatever life throws at me. I actually look forward to re-visiting this blog post one year from now. So many things can happen. One moment can change everything.
I do have a couple of LOs to share with you! Here is one I did of my Tristan, I just love this photo. I often put off scrapping "favorite" photos for fear I can't do them justice but I love the ethereal feel this LO has to it. The papers from Jennifer Howland's Rendevous Paper Pack couldn't have been more perfect!! AND it's a steal at $2.50!!!!
Obviously, that is not how things happened. If someone had told me that a year ago, I would have been devastated. Now....I'm okay. I wish I could say I'm great. I wish I could say I'm the happiest I've ever been. I can't say those things though. I can say that I survived. I stumbled several times a long the way. I have experienced depression so heavily that I did not want to make it to the next day. I have experienced a lot of sadness in this past year. More than my share, I'm afraid. But I made it. I'm here, really no worse for the wear.
In a sense, I feel somewhat empowered by that. I wish I felt more empowered by it. I wish I had made some great stride in the past year that would make me feel proud for doing it by myself. However, much of my year truly was just surviving. Just making it to the next day. Doing what I absolutely had to do and no more. I know that is an accomplishment, I didn't think I could do that much...by myself.
I wonder what the future holds for me and my boys. I know now, that is a good thing that we can't foresee our futures. We go through things in our life that we need to experience. We have no idea how it will change us inside. I try not to be afraid of my future. If anything, I know I'll be able to get through whatever life throws at me. I actually look forward to re-visiting this blog post one year from now. So many things can happen. One moment can change everything.
To celebrate my year of indepence everything in my stores at A Cherry On Top and Elemental Scraps have been marked down to $1 for 24 hours only!! Celebrate with me girls!!
I do have a couple of LOs to share with you! Here is one I did of my Tristan, I just love this photo. I often put off scrapping "favorite" photos for fear I can't do them justice but I love the ethereal feel this LO has to it. The papers from Jennifer Howland's Rendevous Paper Pack couldn't have been more perfect!! AND it's a steal at $2.50!!!!
Here is another cute little girl! I have to hit my friends up for girl picks to scrap CT assignments with :P! This photo could not have been more perfect for Paula Duncan's Garden Party!!
Read Credits HERE
posted by Tabatha at 4:41 AM
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